Real or Reel

In Philippine show business, it is a fad to have love teams. They usually are pair a cute couple, market them to the fans and if they click, they become instant pop-idols. Usually love teams are for teenagers or young adults. Some are just for television and in the movies but some relationships go beyond the klieg lights.

In class, we do have two love teams. One side of the group, there’s the tandem of Kristian and Aileen. I don’t know if there is really a thing with the two since they are usually seated on the other side of the room.


While on the other side of the group, there’s the tandem of Ian and Iyah.


From both tandems, I’m more in the Ian and Iyah group. Iyah’s my seatmate since Day 1 and we hit it off from the start. While Ian, what can I say, the known chick boy in class. Ha, ha, ha! Peace, Michael!

I can’t remember when they started teasing the four individuals but all that we can say it makes the class more exciting and lighter. As per Cat’s term, “parang high school”.

For my part, it’s just like my first year in UP. Kakilig moments!

Tagged!

I got tagged in Facebook more than three times for this exercise which is why I’m sharing this to everybody today. I wanted to answer the questionnaire seriously but as I was typing away the first tags, I got tired and decided to just write what comes in mind my first.

Here goes…

Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

(To do this, go to "notes" under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.)

1. I love my siblings to the max.
2. I always read the Entertainment section first in the daily newspaper.
3. I do have Hypothyroidism (Hashimoto's Disease) and that is the reason why I am so chubby.
4. I love traveling.
5. I am an obsessive-compulsive freak.
6. I do believe in Santa Claus.
7. I do love to swim and breaststroke is my forte.
8. I love writing. You should see my paper and cards collection.
9. I love sending greeting cards to friends and families. I never forget a birthday even anniversaries. You will definitely receive a greeting (online, post or a call) on your special day.
10. I love taking pictures. I consider them my treasures. I cannot leave home without a camera.
11. I still heart Joseph Joachim De Leon.
12. I do love good food with good conversations. Lunch/dinner for me can last for more than two hours with good friends.
13. I love watching movies. I always go for the first full show during opening day.
14. I heart dark chocolates.
15. I collected the Sweet Dreams Series during Elementary and High School days.
16. If I have been away in the Philippines for a long time, the first viand that I would like to eat is chicken pork adobo and pritong galunggong!
17. I am a gadget person in moderation. I would love to have the latest gadgets if it will serve a purpose in my day-to-day activities.
18. I still keep my childhood toy named Niño.
19. I am such an emotional person that I cry easily.
20. Since I so love my schools, I can still sing the school hymn with vigor and enthusiasm.
21. I heart Danny McCoy, Seth Cohen and Nate Archibald.
22. I am always on the lookout for the best Chocolate Cake.
23. I have a small pillow as my security blanket when I sleep.
24. I love wearing high-heeled shoes.
25. My favorite scent comes from Ralph Lauren.
    

The result? Pretty much what I am in a nutshell!

New Year’s Resolutions

... That Are Easy To Keep...

1. Read fewer books. A little learning is a dangerous thing. Too much of it can really wreck your head.
2. Gain weight, at least 40 pounds. Didn't your mom always say you were bit skinny.
3. Cut down on exercise. Too much is bad for your health, it can even kill you.
4. Watch more TV. It's very educational. Catch up on all those programs you missed down the years.
5. Draw up a list of people, who were nasty to you in the past year, get your own back on them in the next year!
6. Drink more. Wasn't it Benjamin Franklin who said, beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. So be happy.
7. Eat more nice things like candy, Big Macs, popcorn and ice cream. Eat less junk like fresh fruit, vegetables and soy nuts.
8. Work less. Take it easy. All work and no play can make you a dull boy or girl.
9. Play more computer games. Scientists say they're good for you and improve your visual skills. But you always knew that.
10. Take up some worthwhile new habit, like smoking - it helps keep tobacco workers in jobs.

Tee Hee!


Happy 2009, everybody!

2008's Christmas Song

I got this earlier from a friend who works for a multinational firm. Let us all sing together to an old song with new lyrics…

The Christmas Song
The Investment Banker Version

You'd better watch out
You'd better not cry
You'd better keep cash
I'm telling you why:
Recession is coming to town.

It's hitting you once,
It's hitting you twice
It doesn't care if you've been careful and wise
Recession is coming to town
It's worthless if you've got shares.

It's worthless if you've got bonds
It's safe when you've got cash in hand
So keep cash for goodness sake, HEY

You'd better watch out
You'd better not cry
You'd better keep cash
I'm telling you why:
Recession is coming to town!

Finance products are confusing
Finance products are so vague
The banks make you bear the cost of risk
So keep out for goodness sake, OH

You'd better watch out
You'd better not cry
You'd better keep cash
I'm telling you why:
Recession is coming to town.

Catchy. Funny. So true!

Origins of the Internet

Let’s see…

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot. And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she was named Amazon Dot Com.

And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel far from town to town with thy goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?"

And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, dear?" And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale and they will reply telling you which hath the best price. And the sale can be made on the drums and the goods can be delivered by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums. And the drums rang out and were a wondrous happening. Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever moving from his tent.

But this success did arouse envy. A man named Maccabia did secrete himself inside Abraham's drum and was accused of insider trading. And the young man did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung. He was called a Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominant Siderite, or NERD for short.

And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were going to the drum maker, one Brother William of Gates, who bought up every drum company in the land. And indeed did insist on making drums that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.

And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others."

And as Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or as it came to be known "eBay" he said, "We need a name that reflects what we are."

And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."

"YAHOO," said Abraham.

And that is how it all began.

Ha, ha, ha!

I Don't Wanna Work

Another cute one…

1. My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned. I couldn't concentrate.
2. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
3. After that, I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it - mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
4. Next, I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was too exhausting.
5. Then, I tried to be a chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme.
6. I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it I couldn't cut the mustard.
7. My best job was a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.
8. I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.
9. Next, was a job in a shoe factory. I tried but I just didn't fit in.
10. I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
11. I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
12. So then I got a job in a workout center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
13. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian - until I realized there was no future in it.
14. My last job was working in Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.\
15. So, I tried retirement and found that I’m perfect for the job!
    

Tee Hee! What a laugh!

Big Booty of Treats

Boo! It's Halloween and it's time for trick or treat!


All you need to do is say "trick-or-treat," smile, extend your Halloween bag and voila - Halloween candies!


All the kids had their fair share of a bagful of nice Halloween treats.


Have a Fa-boo-lous Halloween!

Workplace Language

This is cute…

Blamestorming: Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.

Chainsaw Consultant: An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the top brass with clean hands.

Cube Farm: An office filled with cubicles.

Prairie Dogging: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.

Elvis Year: The peak year of something's or someone's popularity. "Barney the Dinosaur's Elvis year was 1993."

Idea Hamsters: People who always seem to have their idea generators running.

Mouse Potato: The online, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.

Ohnosecond: That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a big mistake.

SITCOMs: What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids. Stands for Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage.

Starter Marriage: A short-lived first marriage that ends in a divorce with no kids, no property and no regrets.

Stress Puppy: A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.

Tourists: People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their jobs. "We had three serious students in the class; the rest were just tourists."

Xerox Subsidy: Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.

Alpha Geek: The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group. "Ask Trisha, she's the alpha geek around here."

Assmosis: The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard.

Beepilepsy: The brief seizure people sometimes have when their beeper goes off (especially in vibrator mode). Characterized by physical spasms, goofy facial expressions and interruption of speech in mid-sentence.

Depotphobia: Fear associated with entering a Home Depot because of how much money one might spend. Electronics geeks experience Shackophobia.

Flight Risk: Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning to leave a company or department soon. Irritainment: Entertainment and media spectacles that are annoying, but you find yourself unable to stop watching them. The O.J. trials were a prime example.

Percussive Maintenance: The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.

Seagull Manager: A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, sh-ts over everything and then leaves.

Uninstalled: Euphemism for being fired. Heard on the voicemail of a vice president at a downsizing computer firm: "You have reached the number of an uninstalled vice president. Please dial our main number and ask the operator for assistance." See also Decruitment.

My absolute favorite – Idea Hamsters. As for myself, I’m a self-confessed Mouse Potato.

A Woman's Dictionary

Copied and reposted…

Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he just hasn't realized it yet.

Airhead (er*hed) n. What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over by a policeman.

Bar-be-que (bar*bi*q) n. You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat and cleaned everything up, but he "made the dinner."

Blonde jokes (blond joks) n. Jokes that are short so men can understand them.

Cantaloupe (kant*e*lope) n. Gotta get married in a church.

Clothes dryer (kloze dri*yer) n. An appliance designed to eat socks.

Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n. A drink you buy at a convenience store to go with a half pound bag of peanut M&Ms.

Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n. The last two minutes of a football game.

Exercise (ex*er*siz) v. To walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase.

Grocery List (grow*ser*ee list) n. What you spend half an hour writing, then forget to take with you to the store.

Hair Dresser (hare dres*er) n. Someone who is able to create a style you will never be able to duplicate again. See "Magician."

Hardware Store (hard*war stor) n. Similar to a black hole in space-if he goes in, he isn't coming out anytime soon.

Childbirth (child*brth) n. You get to go through 36 hours of contractions; he gets to hold your hand and say "focus,...breath...push..."

Lipstick (lip*stik) n. On your lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of your mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear...!

Park (park) v./n. Before children, a verb meaning, "to go somewhere and neck." After children, a noun meaning a place with a swing set and slide.

Patience (pa*shens) n. The most important ingredient for dating, marriage and children. See also "tranquilizers."

Waterproof Mascara (wah*tr*pruf mas*kar*ah) n. Comes off if you cry, shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.

Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n. A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky to get a card.

Oh, what a vocabulary, oh my!

The Ten Conyo-mandments

Saw this from Meyan’s blog and forwarded the script to my cheeblings.

The Ten Conyo-Mandments
(taken from The La Sallian-Menagerie)

Conyo here, conyo there, conyo everywhere! Here at La Salle, conyospeak has become an unofficial language as a good chunk of the student body knows, or maybe even mastered the socialite tongue. However, one must never forget the basics of the conyo and we thusly bring you: The Ten Conyomandments.

1. Thou shall make gamit "make+pandiwa".
"Let´s make pasok na to our class!"
"Wait lang! I´m making kain pa!"
"Come on na, we can´t make hintay anymore!"

2. Thou shall make kalat "noh", "di ba" and "eh" in your pangungusap.
"I don´t like to make lakad in the baha nga, noh? Eh di ba it´s like, so ewww, di ba?
"What ba? Stop nga being maarte noh!"
"Eh as if you want naman also, di ba?

3. When making describe a whatever, always say "It´s SO pang-uri!".
"It´s so malaki, you know, and so mainit!"
"I know right? So sarap nga eh!"
"You´re making me inggit naman, I´ll make bili nga my own burger."

4. When you are lalaki, make parang punctuation "dude", "tsong" or "pare".
"Dude, ENGANAL is so hirap, pare."
"I know, tsong, I got bagsak nga in quiz one, eh."

5. Thou shall know you know? I know right!
"My bag is so bigat today, you know."
"I know, right! We have to make dala pa kase the jumbo Physics book eh!"

6. Make gawa the plural of pangalans like in English or Spanish.
"I have so many tigyawats, oh!"

7. Like, when you can make kaya, always like. Like, I know right?
"Like it´s so init naman!"
"Yeah! The air-con, it´s like sira kase eh!"

8. Make yourself feel so galing by translating the last word of your sentence, you know, your pangungusap?
"Kakainis naman in the LRT! How plenty tao, you know, people?"
"It´s so tight nga there, eh, you know, masikip?"

9. Make gamit of plenty of abbreviations, you know, daglat?
"Like OMG! It´s like traffic sa EDSA."
"I know, right? It´s so kaka!"
"Kaka?"
"Kakaasar!"

10. Make gamit the pinakamarte voice and pronunciation you have para full effect!
"I´m like, making aral at the Arrhneow!"
"Me naman, I´m from Lazzahl!"

One Cheebling replied: “So loka tlaga, u knw. Its so lyk gawa ng Lazalista yan, ryt. Make pdala 2 my mail nmn s YM, its so kul kc. Pra pdala q s mga friendships q, u knw, my frendly frends”.

I had fun reading the whole set and receiving a reply from Cheebling No. 2. So funny naman, I’m making tawa-tawa na. Ha, ha, ha!

Words of Wisdom

I got this from Tita Carol…

Six Pinoy Words of Wisdom

1. Lahat ng problema may solusyon, kung walang solusyon, wag mo nang problemahin.
2. Always remember, kung kaya ng iba, ipagawa mo sa kanila. Don't force yourself, make life easy.
3. Hindi lahat ng gwapo may girlfriend ang iba sa kanila may boyfriend.
4. Don't face your problem if your problem is your face; umiwas sa lahat ng bagay na nakakaaninag- - salamin; microwave; stainless steel na kawali, kaldero, kutsara, tinidor.
5. Di bale ng tamad, di naman pagod.
6. Praktis makes perfect but nobody's perfect, so don't praktis
   

What do you think? True or False?

Things to Say When Stressed Out

I like the last one!

Loss for words when the going gets tough? This ought to be your guide the next time:

• "Okay, okay! I take it back. Unfuck you!!!"
• "You say I’m a bitch like it’s a bad thing?!"
• "How many times do I have to flush before you go away?"
• "Well, this day was a total waste of make-up."
• "Well, aren’t we a bloody ray of sunshine?"
• "Don’t bother me, I’m living happily ever after."
• "Do I look like a fucking people person!"
• "This isn’t an office. It’s HELL with fluorescent lighting!"
• "I started out with nothing… still have most of it left."
• "I pretend to work, they pretend to pay me."
• "YOU!! … Off my planet!!!"
• "Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble plastic is cheap. You choose."
• "Practice random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control."
• "Errors have been made. Others will be blamed."
• "And your cry-baby, whiny-assed opinion would be…?"
• "I’m not crazy. I’ve been in a very bad mood for 30 years."
• "Sarcasm is just one more service I offer."
• "Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed."
• "Do they ever shut up on your planet?"
• "I’m not your type. I’m not inflatable"
• "Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven’t gone to sleep yet."
• "Back off!! You’re standing in my aura."
• "Don’t worry. I forgot your name too."
• "I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?"
• "I work 45 hours a week to be this poor."
• "Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?"
• "Not all men are annoying. Some are dead."
• "Wait… I’m trying to imagine you with a personality…"
• "Chaos, panic, and disorder… my work here is done."
• "Ambivalent? Well, yes and no."
• "You look like shit. Is that the style now?"
• "Earth is full. Go home."
• "Aw, did I step on your poor little bitty ego?"
• "I’m not tense, just terribly, terribly alert."
• "A hard-on doesn’t count as personal growth."
• "You are depriving some village of an idiot."
• "If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport."
  

Those where the days… Wink, wink!